I straddle Matt’s hips with my thighs as I hold onto the back of the bike so hard that my fingers begin feeling numb and my knuckles feel like they’ll pop out of my hand skin. A part of me knows that I’m terrified as we warp through the bumpy streets at illegal speeds past slabs of broken concrete and twisted metal and random fires that heat the air as we speed past. We swerve nauseatingly around abandoned cars—some totaled, some on fire—motorcycles that look functioning but that must have run out of gas, and the occasional hollowed-eye dumdum that only realizes we’re approaching long after we’ve past. Read More
Suggested to me by the awesome K. Ryan Henisey, “I’ll pray for you” (IPFY) is a special kind of passive-aggressive rhetorical device wielded by Christian folk and tailored especially for queer people (and atheists)–similar to Tolerance is a two-way street in that it’s more or less used by the same demographic. Chances are that if you live in the South or Midwest, you’ve heard it before. In this edition of #QueersCantWith, I’ll dissect how Christians use “I’ll pray for you” and provide ways that you can defend yourself against it.
“So you don’t think rubbing your ahem against another man’s ehehm and sticking it inside is wrong?”
“Not when it feels this right.” Read More
This is the first part in the #QueersCantWith series, where I find the most eye-roll inducing phrases and actions and take them to task. Enjoy!
So I’m talking to an American woman I just met at a club in Recife, Brazil, and she says something unthinkable: “It’s like I’m a gay man trapped inside a straight woman’s body.” If you’re like me, you’re probably a little bit stunned. Not because it’s an unthinkable identity by a longshot, but because when used by a cisgender-heterosexual (cishet) person as a means of finding common ground with gay men it can be problematic. I think about it for a second. Is she legit about to come out to me as trans* in the middle of a crowded bar? Read More
I follow the #Queer hashtag on Twitter. Aside from it’s overbearing (oftentimes triggering) usage as a slur, there are people who use it for good. I follow it personally for the news and heartwarming things I find. Here are some of the good ones I’ve come across recently.
1. Building community. #AcademicQueerty
— Transgress Press (@trans_books) January 12, 2014
We all know that guy. No, not that guy–THAT guy. He’s our friend, our friend’s friend or boyfriend, the guy our friend invites at the last minute but whom we are assured is cool before we all go out and then we find out he’s a party-pooping joy-succubus. If you don’t know the monster, then the monster is probably you. Sorry, just is. Here are some traits of THAT guy that you can use to make sure you do not become the monster you are trying to avoid.
1. You suffer from Resting Bitchface Syndrome. Read More
He’s got a long face and his nose is also long—ill-fitting on any other type of face, but perfect on his. His lips are thin, dark and matte in the noonday sun, but he licks them often and I can’t keep my eyes from being trained on his for the seconds that his pink tongue slithers from his mouth to hydrate his lips before running back inside of his mouth and assuming its job of producing words that I only half-understand. I haven’t yet gotten his name, but he’s the boy that carries the water back to my home.
Basically, 100 queer words per entry. Sometimes more, sometimes less. Feel free to submit your own!
So can we please talk about the big ups I’m giving the Katie Couric Show videos wherein Katie discussed transgender issues? The interviews she aired with Carmen Carrera (model) and Laverne Cox (actress of Orange is the New Black) absolutely gave me LIFE! Not only did these beautiful women speak flawlessly and amazingly about their experiences, they also drew the boundaries regarding privacy (because, seriously–nobody ever asks cis people about the status of their penises or vaginas) and basically said: this down here? this thing right here? MINE. back the fuck up. Except they said it with the kind of confidence and elegant respectability that would make Meryl Streep do a double take. (While I’m not big on the mandate of societal respectability, it can and does serve its purpose when utilized well. And like most creative queers, subversion of a tool typically used for oppression was second nature.) Read More
Happy New Year! I hope yours was wonderful! I passed this short holiday on a trip to the easternmost-point of Brazil with my partner and our friends. Muito divertido! (translation: A lot of fun!) And wound up with a cold/allergies the next day that are just drying out as I write this. Muito divertido! (translation: WTF did I do to deserve this?).
At any rate, I’ve been lining up what I think are some pretty cool pieces–queer consumables for your pleasure, including interviews with Dean Atta (British spoken-word poet, hip hop artist, and author of I am Nobody’s Nigger), Redfern Jon Barrett (Berlin-based writer, author of Forget Yourself, and the upcoming novel Olympia: The Homosexual Republic), reviews of the works of the guys I just mentioned, and some other fun stuff (including a piece on polyamory that I’m looking forward to by a good friend based in Japan).
I have also been giving some thoughts to other things, like a saying that I’ve noticed a lot of conservatives are pretty fond of: “tolerance is a two-way street.” I was under the impression that it was a minimally constructed bridge made up of the stones most likely to break that didn’t work in your other construction projects because tolerance is the bare minimum, but OK, cool–whatevs.
Not whatevs. Very not whatevs. Read More